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Church Chronicles: Aunty Feminist Goes to Church Review

It is understandable now that we are in women’s history month to talk about a woke subject–feminism. 

It was scary and somewhat brave to broach this topic, as it is a sensitive one that is more often than not spoken about among church ladies. It’s not for a lack of them not being aware of these things, but it’s more of being selectively mute about it in church. Yeah, the Church is not a circus where everyone speaks of whatever comes to their minds and makes it a rowdy place. But then, these issues are being discussed everywhere else.  

Worship Experience Review-Church Chronicles 1

The story started with a simulation of what people call capital tongues from the prayer cord. Yeah, just like the stereotypes, he is a guy. And from the concave lenses of Sayo, the story continues. We see a beautifully dressed female chorister take the microphone to lead the worship. Only later did we know the gravity of that action of merely taking the microphone. The prayer cord had set the congregation on fire using the same microphone, and it was to be used to project the wership of Jeezes, according to Mumcy Precious, the female chorister.

E fit Shock You – Church Chronicles Season 2

E don tey wey me and you don jam for this space. Na exam I write write write oh. I say I no get time to dey write again. For how many months wey he be like that? I con tell myself “After exam, you go con resume.” Na wetin I think be that. But after we finish exam, I try. I try but he con be like say the plan of say I go dey give back to back stories like layer upon layer of cake, but na only rest I dey rest. Birthday issue still don enter. Na then I know say that week don commot too. You know, person go fit pray and do many many things sotey usher imself into a new year. Na so week dey climb on top week for my eyes. E shock me.

Sabbath Church Chronicles Hearty christian stories

Church Chronicles 1-7

Church Chronicles is currently on its 7th lap. That means we have seven whopping stories with “Church Chronicles” as its umbrella.

But right now, we’re taking a short pause to reflect. It’s just right to say we’re on Sabbath.

We want reviews of any of the Church Chronicles to date from you, our reader. Don’t keep those awesome thoughts and discussions you’ve had about the series to yourself. You can send your reviews here.

After then, we can see if we can continue with the Church Chronicles series.

Xoxo.

Check out the Church Chronicles Series

Picture at an AUCSF Watergate program

Drip Drip | Church Chronicles 7

“Calm down now. Your phone selfie camera is on. Look into it and act like you’re enjoying the drip. Drip drip,” Eucharia said to herself, batting her eyelashes at the camera. Ifeanu rolled her eyes as both walked down the road to Chapel.

“Drip ko. In this land of UI. Two weeks of school stress and such vanity is gone,” She thought. 

wide-eyed model. through your eyes

Through your Eyes | Church Chronicles 6

The eye is the lamp of the body: when your eye is clear, your whole body also is full of light…

“What do you see?” Grandma Agbaje pointed at the small window to her right and returned her gaze to those of us in her teenage Sunday school class. Our gazes moved to the window, and some of us stood on our toes.

“The window!” 

“A window with silver aluminium sill,”

benches to rest on

Sabbath | Church Chronicles 5

“Hi,” 

“Hello,” 

It was a weird conversation with a stranger down the winding staircase. It felt good. Sunday arrived early and in sync with the soft instrumental escaping from the second floor. It preluded the start of service.

Sunday was Sabbath. It was a special day of rest when people poured out the streets in their Sunday best. Aso ebi from a cousin’s wedding. The three-piece suit from last Christmas. Agbada from best man duties the previous month. Shoes that were a gift from a friend on her birthday.

woman looking out the window of a train

My Daddy-Longlegs | Church Chronicles 4

My Daddy-Longlegs

When I was a little girl, my whole world went at a pleasantly slow pace. It was endless days of wanting to be an adult. And the calmness and stability of that little world seemed to last forever. The hopeful days of waiting and the protection from my parents from what the world had to offer slowly faded away. They couldn’t shield me from them forever. And I couldn’t stop growing up at a rapid rate. 

This is what I always wanted. But I’m not even yet an adult. I’m just one leg in and another out, and it’s already looking like, “Why is this world so fast?”

Aunty Feminist goes to Church | Church Chronicles 2

The period when women were told to be silent in the church was over. This was what Aunty thought before returning home to Naija.

Unpacking her luggage, she thought about the foremost thing she wanted to do. She would show up in church, the home church she’d been nostalgic about in the UK. 

Life as a working student had not allowed for too much church. She had only attended virtual church gatherings as much as she had the time. Homecoming, she dressed in the only native attire she had, a green agbada and trousers her UK tailor had sewn, ready for the non-virtual experience.

The Worship Experience | Church Chronicles 1

The worship leader collected the wired microphone from the prayer coordinator, who had set the atmosphere burning with some capital tongue speaking in the rented hall.

“Lerogete aikolema ribainda, Endoskelesh endoski barabai!”

He had declared with ferocity and some vibration of hands. One could see that the few members who came to church early had caught the fire. 

Sayo watched through thick concave glasses as the pretty assistant choir coordinator took her place behind the wooden pulpit. A glance at the choir stand made her wonder why the role of praying, using the ‘Prayer cord’ as a reference, usually went to the guys while the Eve gender huddled together for the singing role. Maybe God answered their prayers faster, she thought. 

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